Body confidence is hard work and it's definitely something you have to work at every day. I'm sure even Gisele has a little wobble every now and again even if she does lack wobbly bits.
Whether you're fat, thin, old, young, pregnant or post pregnant and wondering what the fuck has happened to your once taut body (lol who am I kidding, my body was never taut), we all have things about our bodies we would change if we could and bits that downright disgust us when we look in the mirror.
But isn't it all a bit tired now? Are we still gullible enough to believe that the next miracle diet we try will be "the one" and that we won't be face planting a Dominos within 48hrs of starting it? Are we still trying to fool ourselves and each other that eating clean and training dirty is a piece of cake when ironically the only thing we can think of while eating clean is an actual piece of cake? Mmmm cake.
And aren't we sick of being patronised by those who insist that we should love ourselves just as we are and be comfortable in our own skin? IT'S JUST NOT THAT EASY! It’s all very well being told to do something but it’s kind of hard when you aren’t told the how. “Love yourself!” Oh ok then, problem solved. Yah sure.
I’m not saying I have the answers but here’s some “Hows” to get you on the right track to loving the body you’re in.
- Stop following those bloody ‘fitspiration’ accounts on Instagram
They’re not there for inspiration, they’re there so people who possess the body beautiful can show off their chiseled abs and gain validation through likes. If you’re starting a fitness journey then that’s great, but make sure your goals are realistic and manageable. If you’re 3 stone overweight then looking at pictures of girls in bikinis with 2% body fat is just going to make you hate yourself.
- Find some body love accounts on Instagram
Finding people on Instagram who may not have ‘perfect’ bodies but who look fab and love them anyway will make you feel tons better about your own belly rolls (we all have them when we sit down anyway) or ham arms or whatever part of your body you’re currently obsessing over.
- Make a list about all the stuff you DO like about your body
Whether it’s killer eyebrows, long legs or piercing eyes - focusing on the good stuff will have you all like ‘Bad stuff? What bad stuff?’
- Accept that you have a body type and limitations
Some people love exercise, some people love sitting on their arse watching Netflix. Some people lose weight quickly and don't put it on easily, whereas some have the body type where they put on a stone just by walking down the crisp aisle in the asda. Can I get an amen? You might never have the frame to get down to a size 8 and you might look ill if you tried – just focus on being healthy rather than being skinny/thigh-gappy/having a bony mons pubis (yeh apparently that’s a thing now).
- Realise the Kardashians are not body role models
Yah sure, kylie has amazing lips and Khloe has a fantastic bum and Kim has the boobs to end all boobs BUT THEY PAID FOR THEM! No Kardashian money means no Kardashian body – early pictures of them are testament to that.
- Treat nasty comments from irrelevant people with the same distain as kitten heels.
So some welly faced bitch or some small dicked dough faced gobshite called you a ‘fat cow’. Wow. Original. Sorry who are you again and why should I care? Oh wait… I don’t. Channel the sass, feel the sass flow through you.
- Find an exercise you love
There’s no point punishing yourself at an army style bootcamp if you’re going to absolutely despise every minute – 1. How’s that making you feel good? And 2. It’ll never stick. Find something you love – Zumba? Glow Fit? Poledancing? Hiking? All much more fun versions of pumping iron at the gym and they'll have you feeling and looking better in no time.
Feel shitty about a new wrinkle that’s appeared? Look get Botox if you want and be arsed with all the people who turn their nose up at it. It’s a personal decision and if it makes you feel better then go for it. If you were going for a brand new hairstyle then you wouldn’t go to a shitty back street hairdressers so don’t go to a shitty back street cosmetic surgery clinic. If you find yourself getting more and more procedures done and you’re not really feeling any better about yourself then that would suggest the problem runs deeper than skin and maybe speaking to a counselor would help.
Unfortunately there’s no shortcut to this one – loving your body gets easier with age. As you mature you tend to shed a lot of your crippling insecurities, especially when you realize that everyone’s in the same boat. I look back at photos of myself aged 18 when I thought I was fat and I’d be lucky to fit a leg in half those dresses now… but ironically I’m probably more confident now than I was then. Oh youth… it really is wasted on the young.
So go forth and love thyselves. It might not happen overnight so if you find yourself hating on yourself just have a word - you wouldn't let someone talk to your best mate like that and your body is the best mate you'll ever have.